Homer shows up REALLY late for work and as a punishment he has to eat toxic waste. Instead he blows off his punishment and goes bowling with Lenny and Carl and he bowls a perfect 300 game. He gets on the news and becomes a local hero. He speaks to schoolchildren and he appears on "Springfield Squares." His celebrity begins to fade. He compares himself to Jesus. He gets depressed and goes to the top of a tall building and jumps off, but a bungee jumping Otto saves him. He thinks that God has saved him for a higher purpose, so he begins to look for it. He decides it might be his children, but he thinks that it isn't Bart or Lisa since they don't appear to need him. So he takes an interest in raising Maggie. He teaches her how to swim, but she has a fear of the water. When Homer almost drowns, she saves his life. So he teaches her how to bowl and she scores a 295 game.

Hank wins an Alamo Beer contest, which gives him the chance to win 1 million dollars. He travels to a football game in New Orleans to try and win Bobby's college money, amongst other things. Meanwhile, Bill rides along to his aunt's plantation in Louisiana to visit. He is confronted by three very beautiful cousins each with an agenda to marry the last remaining available Dauterive, who happens to be Bill.

Scully frantically searches for a way to help her ailing partner without having anyone to turn to for help, while a catatonic Mulder's dreams lead him away from his mission and the X-Files to a place which he believes is a better life.

Fry becomes obsessed with winning a contest sponsored by his favorite drink, Slurm. He goes through many cans in order to try and find the golden bottlecap hidden inside one of them, using the Professor's latest invention, the F-ray, to help. Finally, Fry is successful and wins a VIP tour of the Slurm factory for him and the rest of the crew, as well as the chance to party with Slurms MacKenzie. Along the tour, everyone becomes curious as to what Slurm's secret ingredient is. Fry, however, is more concerned with quenching his thirst. When he accidentally falls into the Slurm river trying to sneak a sip, Leela and Bender jump in after him. The three end up discovering the disgusting truth behind Slurm.

Betty, very scared, tries to stop Hermes from arguing with Armando, while Armando, furious, admits to Marcela that Betty is of no use to him and that he is going to fire her. Armando fires Betty without giving her the opportunity to hand over the work she has done for him.