Malcolm in the Middle
Season 5

s05e01 / Vegas

3rd Nov '03 - 12:00am
Vegas Summary

When Dewey's pet rabbit does good in a state contest, the family must travel to Las Vegas for the nationals. But Reese unknowingly sells the rabbit to a restaurant. Now it is up to Dewey (with a little help from a "choking" Reese) to try and save the rabbit.
Meanwhile, Malcolm tells Hal and Lois that they embarras him, and that is why he didn't tell them he won state science honors. As a form of repayment, Malcolm gets great seats for him and Lois to see Lois' favorite singer. Lois then gets lucky and is invited backstage where all she really wants to do is figure out why Malcolm doesn't want her around.
Hal, on the other hand, is looking all across Las Vegas for a slot machine that he has had dreams of winning the jackpot on.
Francis is also in trouble when he gets behind on duties at the ranch, and for the first time sees that Otto isn't just a pushover for everything.

2305 have watched this episode

s05e02 / Watching the Baby

10th Nov '03 - 12:00am
Watching the Baby Summary

Hal and the boys offer to watch baby Jamie so an exhausted Lois can finally get some sleep. Hal leaves the boys in charge while he goes to the Lucky Aid to pick up more diapers. While the boys are watching Jamie, three beautiful teenage girls arrive and woo Malcolm, Reese and Stevie away for the night, leaving Dewey alone with the baby. Meanwhile at the Lucky Aid, Hal doesn't have enough money for the diapers and Craig forces him to work. Back at home, Dewey concocts an elaborate bedtime story for Jamie involving each member of his family.

2302 have watched this episode

s05e03 / Goodbye Kitty

17th Nov '03 - 12:00am
Goodbye Kitty Summary

Abe refuses to tell Stevie that his mother isn't coming home as he had promised. So Reese takes it upon himself to deliver the news. Also, Reese finds the diary of what he thinks is his dream girl.

Meanwhile, Francis and Otto must contend with their duties as "real" ranchers when a horse needs to be put down.

2300 have watched this episode

s05e04 / Thanksgiving

24th Nov '03 - 12:00am
Thanksgiving Summary

Malcolm skips out on Thanksgiving to go to a party; Reese becomes abusive to Hal and Dewey as he attempts to prepare Thanksgiving dinner.

2300 have watched this episode

s05e05 / Malcolm Films Reese

1st Dec '03 - 12:00am
Malcolm Films Reese Summary

Malcolm's teacher, Mr. Herkabe, tricks him into filming Reese on his most tender moments, and then humiliates Reese and makes Malcolm seem like a monster.

2300 have watched this episode

s05e06 / Malcolm's Job

8th Dec '03 - 12:00am
Malcolm's Job Summary

Malcolm gets a job working for Lois on the drugstore loading dock but is shocked to find that Lois smokes. She makes him promise not to tell, then turns her back on him and writes him up for a silly offense. Meanwhile, Dewey runs away to the Ranch to be with Francis because he says he is tired of Reese and Malcolm. Hal is also busy, secretly betting on and entering Jaime in baby competitions.

2301 have watched this episode

s05e07 / Christmas Trees

15th Dec '03 - 12:00am
Christmas Trees Summary

Hal and the boys slash the prices of their Christmas trees to outsell a nearby church. Back at the ranch, Otto's bickering relatives descend, reminding Francis of home sweet home.

2300 have watched this episode

s05e08 / Block Party

5th Jan '04 - 12:00am
Block Party Summary

When the Wilkersons came back from their vacation they found out that the whole block was making a huge party to celebrate that they were gone. While Lois and Hal join a sausages-eating contest, Reese and Dewey start to make money by torturing younger boys and Malcolm, without knowing it, helps a thief to steal everything in the garage of an innocent family.

2299 have watched this episode

s05e09 / Dirty Magazine

12th Jan '04 - 12:00am
Dirty Magazine Summary

Malcolm tells the A.C.L.U (a group that's against the unfair censorship) that they are censoring the almost inoffensive school magazine which is just defending people's rights. Meanwhile, in order to get his old salary back, Hal attempts to flirt with the woman who's responsible of the salary cutbacks.

2301 have watched this episode

s05e10 / Hot Tub

26th Jan '04 - 12:00am
Hot Tub Summary

Jamie's babysitter asks Malcolm to do a small job for her. He accepts without knowing that this "task" involves messing up with Jamie's babysitter ex-boyfriend and a huge family problem. Meanwhile, Dewey's new friend leaves him and befriends Reese while Francis encourages Otto to face an old enemy who almost stole Gretchen from him.

2299 have watched this episode

s05e11 / Ida's Boyfriend

9th Feb '04 - 12:00am
Ida's Boyfriend Summary

Malcolm gets his tongue pierced and needs to hide it for a month. While Lois' mother, Ida, comes and annouces that she will marry a rich Chinese Man that she met on a cruise. Malcolm gets complications when his tongue ring gets infected, rendering him unable to say "S's" and he discovers that Ida has been drugging her fiancé with opiates and mood enhancers. When Lois and Hal confront Ida, she drugs them with free food. But luckily, the fiancé misses a drug treatment, and realizes that Ida is a terrible woman and he leaves her at the altar. Malcolm is punished for his tongue piercing. Meanwhile at the ranch, Otto decides to hire a cuddle mystery acting troup, but it all turns out badly.

2298 have watched this episode

s05e12 / Softball

16th Feb '04 - 12:00am
Softball Summary

Malcolm is convinced to play Softball by Lois and ends up doing very badly at it due to Lois's hold on him. Meanwhile, Francis tries to pick fights with Lois, Reese tries to break Francis's record of collecting toilet seats from a local junkyard, and Hal accidentally applies to become a member of the CIA.

2299 have watched this episode

s05e13 / Lois's Sister

23rd Feb '04 - 12:00am
Lois's Sister Summary

In the milestone 100th episode, "Lois' Sister", Lois' younger sister, Susan (Laurie Metcalf), pays the family a visit and brings with her expensive gifts for the boys, biting remarks for Lois and a cold shoulder for Hal â- whom she has never forgiven for dumping her for Lois. Lois and Susan's competitive relationship takes a turn for the worse when Susan gives Malcolm and Reese her prize '65 Mustang convertible. But when Lois discovers that Susan needs a kidney transplant, she puts her anger aside and offers to donate her kidney to Susan, which Susan only sees as the perfect opportunity for Lois to one-up her.

2298 have watched this episode

s05e14 / Malcolm Dates a Family

15th Mar '04 - 12:00am
Malcolm Dates a Family Summary

Lois blows her top over a hidden 15 percent ser charge in the bill at her family's favorite pizza place and stages a boycott... but Hal and the boys are sneaking slices on the side. Malcom meets Angela and becomes instantly smitten with her intellectual family... but starts to feel like a heel because he's asked another girl to the school dance and is forced to break it off with her - er - them. And Francis is reluctant to let Otto hire an assistant for him... but soon comes to like the idea.

2298 have watched this episode

s05e15 / Reese's Apartment

22nd Mar '04 - 12:00am
Reese's Apartment Summary

Reese rents an apartment after being thrown out of the Wilkersons' house - but finds it difficult to avoid debt. Malcolm helps a football player write an essay to get him into college. However, when the sportsman turns out to be even stupider than he thought, he is faced with a dilemma.

2298 have watched this episode

s05e16 / Malcolm Visits College

29th Mar '04 - 12:00am
Malcolm Visits College Summary

Lois tags along with Malcolm as he visits a college, but she's determined to room in the dorm Malcolm is staying in when she learns the room is co-ed.
Meanwhile, after his father denies him a piano, Dewey begins stealing objects from around the house to amuse himself and to drive Hal crazy.
Reese meets a girl, who he thinks is a narc, and he pretends he is a dealer, unaware that she is really an undercover cop.

2296 have watched this episode

s05e17 / Polly in the Middle

25th Apr '04 - 11:00pm
Polly in the Middle Summary

Hal sets up Abe Kenarben on a blind date with Jaime's babysitter Polly but then realizes Lois has also set her up on a blind date - with Craig. Malcolm, Dewey (with his "lucky" shirt) and Reese also meet Reggie Jackson and Francis is embarrassed by Piama in front of his co-workers.

2297 have watched this episode

s05e18 / Dewey's Special Class

2nd May '04 - 11:00pm
Dewey's Special Class Summary

Dewey is about to make an I.Q. test that will determine if he'll be in the normal class, the Krelboyne class for smart children or the "special" class. Since Malcolm knows that Krelboyne's are always annoyed by their normal classmates, he convinces Dewey to get horrible results. However, the results are really awful and he is sent to the special class for Emotionally Disturbed Kids.

2296 have watched this episode

s05e19 / Experiment

2nd May '04 - 11:00pm
Experiment Summary

When Lois and Hal force a reluctant Dewey into the humiliation of door-to-door candy bar selling, Dewey adopts underhand tactics to get through the unbearable task. He tells each one of his neighbors all profits will go to good causes - and sales go through the roof.

Meanwhile, Malcolm and Stevie are wracking their brains on an impossible science experiment.

2294 have watched this episode

s05e20 / Victor's Other Family

9th May '04 - 11:00pm
Victor's Other Family Summary

When Lois tracks down her father's "other family", she meets Victor's "other wife" Sylvia (Betty White), and learns something shocking about her dad.

2294 have watched this episode

s05e21 / Reese Joins The Army (1)

16th May '04 - 11:00pm
Reese Joins The Army (1) Summary

The house goes crazy as Hal is falsely charged in a crime involving his company which he has nothing to do with. He is put in an ankle collar and is immobile, forcing the rest of the family, including Piama and Francis, to pick up the slack.
Everyone except Reese, who is missing after he discovers Malcolm with his girlfriend Beth. The family doesn't know, but Reese has joined the Army, where he doesn't exactly understand how the military works.
Dewey also has his own problems with the family as no one listens or even knows about him leaving for a music competition.

2298 have watched this episode

s05e22 / Reese Joins The Army (2)

23rd May '04 - 11:00pm
Reese Joins The Army (2) Summary

Reese continues to be a great soldier in the Army until he finds himself in a situation where his Sergeant cannot help. But after comparing being captured to being grounded, he takes action and leads his team to victory. But being such a successful soldier has it's bad parts as well, as Reese prepares to jump from the plane - right into Afghanistan. Malcolm has his hands full as well as he attempts to prove Hal innocent. But being good with numbers helps as Malcolm notices all of the prosecutions given dates are on Fridays - which Hal hasn't worked on in over 15 years. And with Reese missing and Hal's case, Lois falls deeper and deeper into insanity.

2298 have watched this episode
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