George goes up against a survivor of the Andrea Doria shipwreck to get a cheap apartment. Though the panel originally leans toward giving the apartment to the survivor, George wins them over by telling them about his pathetic life and his fiancee dying. Elaine dates a man who has trouble breaking up with women. Jerry and Newman team up to get rid of each other forever -- Jerry helps Newman deliver mail on Sunday so he can get a mail job in Hawaii.

Rumors sweep the ER when Kerry and Mark cloister themselves to discuss policy regarding HIV-positive employees, prompting Jeanie to publicize her condition. Charlie brings the child she has been caring for into the ER. Doug treats the child and feels obligated to report the child's mother for neglect. Doyle treats an abused woman, and conspires to help her escape her husband. Carter blows off an evening with Gant to spend the night with Keaton. Mark inherits a mangy dog from a patient and decides to give it to Rachel for Christmas, but ends up not doing so when he finds Craig has already given her a puppy. Carol and her mother host a traditional Ukrainian Christmas celebration, to which Doug shows up with Charlie, who needs a favor from Carol. Keaton tells Benton that she won't recommend him for another pediatric surgery rotation.

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