Malcolm becomes concerned with his future and his career. He takes an aptitude test, which doesn't help because he finds out that he is equally excellently qualified to do anything. Hal, after having a bad time at Dewey's class career day, quits his job and decides to paint. His family is amazed at the transformation: suddenly he's happy and more attentive to both his sons and his wife. However, he soon becomes obsessed and spends twenty-four hours a day painting, even stealing money from Francis for more paint. He becomes more and more frustrated until he's ready to give up, but Lois pushes him and he finishes his masterpiece... only to have the five hundred gallons of paint he slapped up fall down on his head. Francis gets a job over spring break at Lucky Aide, where Lois works, and loses his mind working for Craig in inventory.

Despite being banned from life forever from the comic book store, Bart and Milhouse take over its management when the Comic Book Guy suffers from a cardiac episode, "the worst episode ever". Their management of the shop is fairly successful, until they discover the Comic Book Guy's secret stash of illegal video clips and begin charging admission for their viewing. Meanwhile, the Comic Book Guy on the road to recovery receives tips from Homer on making friends to no avail. Until a chance meeting with Principal Skinner's mother sparks an unusual relationship.

Hank discovers that he is not a native Texan: he was actually born in New York City, when Cotton took his wife there as part of a plot to kill Fidel Castro. When Hank confronts his father about this, Cotton offers to help Hank become a "real Texan." But it turns out that Cotton is just making Hank the fall guy for yet another Castro-killing scheme.

Doggett found an old case which was investigated by Mulder and was kept a secret from Scully. He decides to follow up the investigation, in order to find any leads into Mulder's disappearance.

Justin's father attacks Brian outside Babylon; Michael gets a promotion at work; Justin moves in with Brian.

Wick's family sues Oz for his death which was caused by the experimental drugs he took. This also means, Dr. Nathan's under investigation and could lose her job. Ryan gets a surprise visit... from his real mother. Howell tells Ryan their trysts are over and she threatens to move on to Cyril. Busmalis confesses to Rebadow that he's a virgin. Schillinger tells Carrie about Hank's death and she immediately goes into labor, delivering the baby in Oz's hospital. Beecher meets a lawyer who tells him his parole chances are decent as long as he stays out of trouble. So what does Beecher do'? He gets thrown in the hole for fighting with his new podmate. After a session with Sister Pete, Vahue decides he doesn't need her help, even though he really does. Hill questions Redding's decision to start eliminating prisoners and takes action. Deyell decides to donate his organs after he's executed. Tidd pays a heavy price for his new allegiance to Said.

When Zapp Brannigan, Kif, Leela, Amy and later in a rescue attempt Bender and Fry crash onto Planet Amazonia, the crew discovers the planet in inhabited by a race of giant women who have found that life without the male gender is preferable. These Amazonian woman worship a Femcomputer who sentences Fry and the rest of the guys to death. It is up to Bender; a manbot and technically not a man, to intercede on the guys' behalf. Meanwhile, Kif professes his love to Amy.