George, thinking his girlfriend is ignoring him, leaves nasty messages on her answering machine. But George finds out that she's actually out of town and enlists Jerry's help to switch answering machine tapes. Meanwhile, Jerry and his girlfriend have a disagreement over a Dockers pants commercial.

Lister tries in vain to teach Kryten how to lie, insult, cheat and disobey orders. Lister gives up when Rimmer calls Kryten on a trip "moon-hopping". On the trip they receive a distress call and Kryten goes to investigate against Rimmer's orders (The planet is about to explode). Kryten rescues a "female" droid called Camille who he falls in love with, even though droids aren't supposed to have feelings like that. Kryten takes Camille back to Starbug, but when Rimmer sees her, she's a hologram who is interested in him. They bring her back to Red Dwarf and then Lister sees a human female with tastes similar to him. Lister notices how everyone reacts to Camille and she confesses to Lister that she is a Pleasure GELF (Genetically Engineered Life Form) programmed to be everyone's perfect companion. The Cat goes to see, and it is not surprising that he sees himself! The GELF turns into her true form at Kryten's request which is a huge green blob. Despite her apalling appearance, Kry