Ruthie insists that T-Bone get his driver's license so they can go away for privacy; unfortunately, T-Bone makes the mistake of asking Kevin to help him get ready for the test. Lou informs a stunned Eric that the church deacons feel he and Lucy are no longer appealing to the younger church members, so it is suggested that Sandy deliver the next sermon. Mac gets a job at the movie theater so he can afford an apartment with Jane and Margaret.

In an effort to stop Homer from taking revenge on the Rich Texan for cutting him off on the highway, Marge, Lisa and Bart offer up three cautionary tales of revenge.
The Count of Monte Fatso: A parody of the book and film The Count of Monte Cristo, in which Homer is cast as the Count.
Revenge of the Geeks: Using a futuristic device called the Get-back-inator, Milhouse takes revenge on the Springfield Elementary bullies.
Bartman Begins: A parody of the Batman origin story, in which Bart is cast in the title role.

Feeling unfeminine after a clothing exchange party with the neighborhood girls, Hank offers Peggy a new pair of shoes. After finding that her usual place in Lubbock is out of business, she stumbles upon 'Clairissa's Closet', and a new best friend, Carolyn. They become the best of friends, until Peggy finds out that Carolyn is a he, and Carolyn finds that Peggy is a she.

When Stan feels like he's not climbing the ladder fast enough at work, he turns to his lifelong ambition of making festive teddy bears. However, when he realizes that making a quick profit takes a lot of work, he resorts to using illegal aliens as cheap labor. Meanwhile, Hayley sees her father's new business model as an atrocity and takes matters into her own hands by calling Uncle Sam.

The fifteen remaining candidates must launch a new product for a national chicken restaurant -- a challenge that was sure to ruffle some feathers. Arrow created the better product and brought in more money selling it for the win. They were finally allowed to move into the mansion. For their reward, they received a personal serenade by Tuscan tenor Andrea Bocelli, complete with a fireworks show. Kinetic, after moving out into the backyard, went to the boardroom for the first time, where Marisa was fired for being disruptive and for failing at her responsibility taking charge of the team's marketing.

In 2002, two kids were shot in front of two different schools on the same day at precisely 8:03 a.m. It's the fifth anniversary of the shootings, and Kat Miller wants to re-open the murders because she feels the cases are connected.

A riot erupts in Boston after an eight-year-old boy is shot 33 times by police. Jordan the rest of the team of coroners as well as Lu and Woody join together to investigate the young boy's death and the police officers' involvement in it. With violence overtaking the city, Jordan and her colleagues are faced with the death of one of their own.

Brian sells Rupert at a garage sale. Stewie, who is upset with Brian, takes him cross country to Colorado to find his beloved teddy, and ends up having a ski-off to win back Rupert. Meanwhile, Peter loses his license, so Meg has to drive him around.

Bette meets the new resident artist, Jodi, but a controversial arts project in her class upsets a potential donor for the college. Papi challenges Alice and the girls to a basketball game. Max reveals a secret to his girlfriend. Jenny schemes her way into meeting Stacey Merkin's girlfriend. Meanwhile, Shane is struggling to scrape up money for a hospital bill.

Brutus and Cassius struggle to raise foreign armies to oppose the Cesarean party. Mark Antony's plans to change his post-consul proconsular governorship from Macedonia to Gaul are derailed when Cicero delivers an in-absentia message to the Senate, and throws his support behind Octavian. Vorenus struggles to contain an all-out gang war in the Aventine Collegium, of his own making,that he blames on Pullo. In the house of the Julii, Octavia passes the hours in a drug induced daze, while a duplicitous youth named Duro, planted amongst the Julii by Servilia, looks for the chance to set a deadly plan in motion.

A fine arts dealer hires Harry because he believes he is being haunted by his 17-year-old daughter. In the process Harry stumbles upon a psychopathic killer that has found a way to cheat death, using an ancient Egyptian tablet.

When the killer's soul finds his way into Murphy's body, Harry must step over the line into dark magic, or risk losing her.

Now onboard Galactica, Baltar faces charges of treason. He contemplates suicide with the help of Number Six. Questions remain about his true identity. Is he a Cylon or isn't he?
Apollo shows off the new drinking establishment on Galactica, Joe's Bar, to Tyrol. Apollo thinks about Kara and wonders whether his marriage to Dee is worth saving.