In Palm Beach, Florida, a man threatens to kill people at an car rental company when they refuse to rent him a car and a driver throws something out a vehicle window that draws suspicion.

(Tampa, FL - 3:41 AM Burglary in Progress) District 2 - MPO Robert Newberry decided to get into law enforcement when he was five. He was working at a racetrack that his dad was part owner of and one day his dad saved him from a wild race car making all this noise and he took off running and he grabbed him and he always looked up to him for that. Two black men were seen trying to steal tires off a car in a dealership on the main road. They find one hiding under a red car as the K9 looks for the second one. They all run down the road and catch him in a parking lot. The guy screams, wails and cried to god he didn't do it and only ran because he was scared. He said he needed the money or else they would kill him, but he doesn't know them and was just holding the tools. Ft. Worth, TX (4:07 PM Suspicious Activity) Officer J.R. Mendoza talks about how he is still going to college. He sees a car sitting alone under a bridge alone in a known drug area. He goes above it on the overpass and looks down and sees a woman in a blue pickup truck using a needle. He and Maldanado go down and bust her and her husband Barnet of three years is the driver. She says her shoulder is injured, she is scared and hasn't ever been cuffed before. They find crack and he is getting arrested and she cries, pleads and says it is hers. San Bernardino - Two men drive a stolen car to a liquor store. The fat guy wants a discount on half a pint of Vodka because it is his birthday. He says he knows the owner Charlie, but he isn't there. The cashier won't do it and he gets belligerent. The cops talk to him and find out he is on parole and now he can go back to jail for Christmas. #1430. 4/6/02

Live from New York (in song), it's... Will Ferrell & Ana Gasteyer!



Sketches include "The Culps in Lamaze Class," "17th Annual Auto Show Spokeman Awards," "MTV Spring Break 2002," "SNL 530," "Astronaut Jones," "Celine Dion on CBS," "Gorgeous Living," "The First Female Peepers," "MTV 4", and "My Big, Thick Novel."



Jimmy Eat World performed "The Middle" and "Sweetness."

Hal's planned night of romance with Lois is put on hold when she has to cover for Craig, who is sick, and ends up infecting both of them with his sickness. It's then a game to see who can pretend to be healthiest the longest.

Meanwhile, Dewey brings home a dog, and with his brothers ratting him over wanting to keep it, he trains it to attack Malcolm and Reese.